Absence Makes the Heart Grow
by OffCenterFold
Summary: Left behind in Tokyo, Megumi is forced to cope with her feelings for two men. If only they both come back alive... Oneshot


She sat up, gasping for breath as her eyes flew open.

"Kensan." But no, he was in Kyoto, leaving her alone to watch over the Kamiya dojo while Kaoru, Yahiko, and Sanosuke chased around with him saving the country again.

What were her own bad dreams compared to the fate of the country?

She chided herself for sounding flippant, knowing how important this journey was, but... It just wasn't fair.

Takani Megumi looked towards the window. There was no hint of light around the drawn shades. It was just one more in an endless string of painfully quiet days and agonizing, sleepless nights.

Countless times, she had had the same dream, and every time she woke up in terror, whispering his name...

_Sanosuke burst into the clinic, carrying a slight, limp form wrapped in a blanket. Kaoru blubbered helplessly behind him, dragged along by Yahiko, as Sanosuke laid his burden on the nearest bed._

_"You've got to save him. He's Japan's only hope, and only you can do it." Sanosuke's eyes burned._

_"That means you're our only hope, Megumisan." Yahiko's eyes were just as determined._

_Megumi knelt next to the limp figure, pulling the blanket away from the face as if she did not yet know who it was, though her guts screamed the truth._

_"Kensan." She looked up to see Sanosuke carrying bandages and herbs while Yahiko hauled water, hot and cold. Kaoru stood and cried soundlessly._

_It was forever before the red-haired man stirred. Megumi fought the hope that swelled within her._

_"I... have to... fight." Kenshin coughed weakly. "To save... Japan. To save... you... my friends." The doctor knew he could fight no more battles. The woman would not believe it._

_"You must rest now, Kensan." Time had no meaning. "I promise, you'll be all right soon, and then you can fight."_

_Her patient's eyes focused, looked at her. "I will." He coughed, smiled - and died._

_"Because of you," Kaoru's voice was broken, shattering the silence. "Kenshin is dead! Japan is dead and Kenshin is dead and you-"_

Megumi lay back and stared at the ceiling. "I will not believe he's gone. He cannot be. Kensan will come back soon. And he will have done what he set out to do."

"And maybe he'll even apologize for not saying goodbye to me." Tears fell silently for many minutes until Megumi fell back asleep.

It was her regular routine.

The next morning, Ayamechan and Suzumechan were asking after him again. Megumi could not help but to overhear the discussion that was becoming almost a daily ritual.

"When will Ken-nii be back?"

"Maybe today, probably tomorrow." Genzaisensei was trying to reassure them.

"You said that yesterday!"

"You did, you said it yesterday!"

Megumi shook her hair loose from the scarf with which she'd tied it back as she listened. Kenshin probably had no idea how much he was missed by those two little girls, and especially by one who was not so little. The old doctor missed the young man as well, for it had been nice for him to spend time with the gentle rurouni who would treat him with respect and friendship, but as importantly, the understanding of another man. Megumi could not help thinking about how difficult it must be for him as well.

Admittedly, without Sanosuke in the area, there was that much less work to be done at the clinic...

Megumi sighed and looked back out the window. When would they return?

The sunset made her think of another shade of red, as real and beautiful as the coming twilight. Long red hair flashed in the sun, in her mind, as its owner looked over his shoulder to smile at her. Strong hands snapped white linen sharply in the sunlight, as their owner smiled at two little girls concentrating on the whiteness in the warm daylight.

The white flash held her attention, a blur of white motion. He stopped, looking over his shoulder, the kanji "Aku" on his back screaming for attention. Red flashes of an overly long bandanna tied around unruly brown hair danced through her head.

"Hmph." Megumi wondered why he had suddenly popped up in her thoughts. He was certainly no Kensan! She hated Sanosuke. Really and truly hated him. She only put up with him at all because he was Kensan's friend. And who knew why - the guy was a lazy, stubborn, irresponsible jerk who couldn't stay out of trouble if he were tied to the floor! He had no ability to speak of, no discipline. He was as strong as an ox and twice as stupid, his temper made even Kaoru look calm and he ate way too much!

So what was the chicken headed punk doing in her thoughts anyway, usurping Kensan's place!

Kensan... now there was a man. Strong, reliable, loyal, sweet, intelligent Kensan who could cook and clean and look at how much the girls loved him! He was wonderful with children! Not to mention modest, generous, and insanely gorgeous. Plus, there was that little issue of saving her life.

Not that Sanosuke hadn't had a hand in that. Neither was he very ugly. Rude, yes, and arrogant beyond belief and -

In her thoughts again! Irritated, Megumi shook her head and went back in to the main room.

"Shall I make dinner now? I know it's a little early but..." The woman let her voice trail off.

"That's a good idea. I'm starving!"

"Grandpa, you're always hungry!"

"Always hungry, Grandpa!" Suzume and Ayame seemed to have put the man they called Ken-nii out of their minds for the time being. Megumi wished she could do the same. She wondered where he was now, wondered if Sano and the others had found him yet. She wished she could go, but as she looked at the old doctor and his granddaughters, she knew she was needed here now more than in Kyoto, where she might be more of a hindrance than an aid.

Besides, Kensan would come back. He owed her that explanation, if only for formality's sake and Kensan was always one to observe the formalities and pay debts.

Not at all like Sanosuke.

Megumi sighed.

"We miss them too, Megumisan. They'll be back."

"I know, Sensei. It's just that... I owed them all so much. They're my friends, and I... I care for them all. Even the chickenhead." Megumi made a face as the old doctor chuckled.

"Don't worry. They're fine. Now, what are you making us for dinner?"

Megumi rolled her eyes and threw her hands up in the air as she headed towards the kitchen.

When she was out of the room, the man beckoned his granddaughters to his side. "Girls, Megumi misses Kenshin and the others very much."

"More than us?" Ayame's eyes were wide with surprise when she asked.

"Megumi misses them too," Suzume informed her sister in all seriousness.

"Yes, Suzume. I don't know about more than you, but she does miss them very, very much. We'll have to take good care of her and watch over her. Kenshin will be proud of you if you do well!" He smiled as the little girls cheered.

"What's the celebration?" Megumi stuck her head out of the kitchen.

"Grandpa says Ken-nii will be very proud of us if we -"

"If they behave themselves well and stay out of trouble, and make sure all the laundry is clean and white." Genzaisensei rested his hands on his granddaughters' heads as he cut off their excited chatter.

Megumi smiled at them. "I know you're up to something," she said as he advanced on the small family, "And I'm going to find out!" She pounced at Ayame and began tickling the girl, as Suzume tried to leap to her sister's defense, and the three chased around, laughing in delight as they romped. "We won't tell, we won't tell!"

Megumi almost forgot about the sweet potatoes she'd set to boil until the old doctor's growling stomach reminded her sharply.

"Oh no!" She stood abruptly and ran into the kitchen.

"Good work, girls!" Grandfather and granddaughters smiled conspiratorially at each other.

Over the following days, Megumi found herself busier than usual with patients and the family. Every other day she would go to the dojo, often with the girls in tow, to straighten up and make sure everything was in good condition for the travelers' return. It was the only time she allowed herself to think about them... About him.

Sometimes, it was hard to remember that she could walk out into the yard and see the girls running and playing without him. It was easy to forget that he was gone on a mission that could take his life rather than merely off on a day trip. Not that there had been any secret about it, nor was it likely they'd have taken a trip without her, but sometimes she wished so much...

It was difficult to remember that he would not be there, doing laundry or playing with the girls. It was so strange, not to see Sanosuke lying about, commenting drily on Kaoru's constant squabbles with her irrepressible, impossible student Yahiko.

She wondered if Sano had looked or acted like the dojo's youngest resident when he'd been that age. She knew he'd been younger than Yahiko when the Sekihou Tai had been all but slaughtered. He'd had a difficult youth, bit that was still no excuse for his insensitive, indolent, intolerable attitude now! Who did he think he was anyway, getting into all those fights with his stupid temper getting the better of him! How often had he shown up half dead? What kind of stupid jerk was he anyway! Did he think he owned her, making her work like that? Even if he had saved her life from Kanryu's evil, and then from her own attempted suicide, he was too much trouble. How in the world did the others put up with him?

And why was she crying, hoping he wasn't hurt again...

Damn him anyway!

She threw down the dust rag and collected the girls, walking back slowly to the clinic. It was easy to let their chatter wash over her until they got back, when she retreated to her room.

"Are you all right, Megumisan?"

"Hai, Genzaisensei. I just need to lie down for a while. I'm really tired."

Megumi smiled at the other doctor as he left, and was surprised to find that it was so. She lay down and was asleep in minutes.

_Kenshin knelt in front of the washtub as usual, "assisted" by Suzume and Ayame. Sano watched Kaoru and Yahiko practicing as usual in the yard, and Megumi smiled at the domestic scene she beheld. Genzaisensei emerged from the dojo with a smile and waved at her as she entered._

_Sanosuke looked up and she saw how pale he looked, how thoroughly drained. Kenshin looked up and waved as well, and the young doctor couldn't help but notice he too looked rather tired, though not nearly as enervated as the ex-gangster. Sanosuke looked away again, and she noticed the dark circles under his eyes. He'd obviously been ill but for some reason she had no memory of it, and as for why that was she had no idea._

_She shrugged and walked to the porch, where Genzaisensei had sat down next to Sano, watching the diligent launderers. "Our patient is looking much better, ne Megumisan?"_

_Megumi found herself nodding._

_"It must be whatever you do for him, since none of my treatments seem to work on him. Taking good care of him before the wedding, ne?" The old man's outrageous wink shocked the young woman._

_"Of course I'm taking care of him! He's my patient, isn't he?"_

_"Yes, yes, I'm not arguing. But as a colleague I must ask, what treatment ARE you giving him?"_

_Megumi could not understand why she answered, "Only the care a woman gives her future __husband, and a doctor her patient, and no more than that."_

_"Meguchan wouldn't do things like that, you dirty old man." Sanosuke looked at them, smiling tiredly. "I'm sorry we had to put the wedding off, Fox, but as soon as I'm strong again, and my voice is back," Sano croaked out faintly, "I promise I'll make it up to you."_

_He rested his hand - how light it felt! - on Megumi's own. Even as her mind rebelled, her voice was answering him, "Sano, my heart, I swear to you it's all right. You'll be better soon, and then we'll be all right."_

Genzaisensei looked in on his colleague.

_"_Sano, my heart, I swear to you it's all right. You'll be better soon, and then we'll be all right."

She was muttering in her sleep - about Sanosuke! Maybe she did need some time off. The old doctor smiled to himself as he thought about it. On the other hand, it was good to know that his partner was not so blind as she tried to be about the two men of the Kamiya dojo, not that she would ever admit it while awake. After all, everyone knew that Kaoru was completely head over heels for the rurouni, and he couldn't be averse to her as a partner for life, the old doctor was sure. Of course, his own colleague loved the man, but she had stayed, letting Kaoru go to Kyoto instead. Who was to say which loved him more?

But if Megumi was falling for Sanosuke, well, the young punk did need her attentions rather often, didn't he?

The old doctor smiled to himself once more as he closed the door. Ah, to be thirty or so years younger! Megumi was such a beautiful woman, but he could never think of her as anything but a daughter, to his occasional mild regret.

Besides, it would be good for her to be involved with the hotheaded ex-gangster. Life for those two would never be boring!

Megumi woke to the late afternoon sun. Realizing she'd only been asleep for about an hour, she sighed. Hadn't she been planning to make dinner again tonight? Only she'd gotten back from the dojo and taken a nap, and there had been that strange dream... She shook her head to clear it.

Ever since that day weeks before, shortly after everyone had left and she'd almost been attacked by Shinomori Aoshi and that freaky cop, she'd been so tired all the time, worrying and working and making elaborate meals even two growing girls and a hungry old man could barely finish. The girls were active enough, but Megumi had noticed Genzaisensei seemed to be gaining a little more weight.

She decided to keep the meals simpler, in the hopes she'd have one less thing to worry about.

As she rose and adjusted her kimono, she thought out all the things she'd been using to keep her mind off what Kenshin and the others were doing.

"The first thing I should do is relax, and maybe buy something else to take naps in. Something that won't open so easily..." Of course, if Sanosuke were here, he'd doubtless appreciate the view..."

Megumi blushed at the thought before scolding herself that he'd no business looking, and besides, it was Kensan who deserved that honor.

Then again, Sano wasn't all bad; he did seem a little hung up on her, and there was the little issue of Kaoru.

It wasn't that Megumi resented the girl much, but she was totally wrong for someone like Kenshin. He was sweet and soft spoken and wise, while the girl was violent and rude and loud and rather naive.

Kenshin only acted clueless, but it made him all the more appealing. Not like Sano, who acted like he'd seen and done it all. Okay, so he may not have been innocent but he was almost as clueless as Kaoru about a lot of things!

Megumi shook her head again and wandered into the main room.

"Let's go to the Akabeko tonight, Megumisan." The older man looked pleased with himself. "I think you deserve a night off, on us."

"Night off!" Suzumechan jumped excitedly.

"We're going out tonight!" Ayamechan piped up.

"I guess I can't fight that, then," Megumi smiled at her adopted family. "Shall we go now then?"

"There's a puppet show the girls wanted to see first, if that's all right." Genzai smiled at the excited children, all doting grandfather.

"Sure," Megumi smiled.

The puppet show was a love story, about two women and two men who were too busy fighting and yelling and being slapstick to realize they could have easily become two happy couples without so much confusion in their lives. There was a great deal of humor and silliness, but Megumi suspected that the old doctor had had other motives than simply humoring his granddaughter's desires to see this particular show.

She lay awake that night in utter turmoil. Something was wrong - Kenshin was badly hurt. She could feel it, in her blood, in her heart, from miles away but what could she do? What if he was very sick? What if he died...?

As a doctor, Megumi had lost patients. She had even, under Kanryu's sadistic control, been responsible for death before. But to lose someone she loved, to lose Kenshin like this, to be so powerless...

She prayed. She was not a very religious soul overall, but she prayed from the core of her soul for his safety.

"Please, bring Kensan back to me. Bring them safely home."

_She knelt between two beds, side by side. Sanosuke and Kenshin were lying on each and she held the hands of both._

_"Don't force me this way; please don't force me to choose this way." She was crying._

_At the head of each bed a candle flickered. Sanosuke's was fairly strong but Kenshin's was sputtering, dripping red wax as it burned, barely clinging to life. A breeze might blow it out._

_The figure on the bed looked uninjured but very pale and drawn._

_There was no sound but that of her own breathing._

_Sanosuke's candle flared briefly and sputtered much like Kenshin's._

_"I love you both."_

It was even stranger than the last dream she'd had, Megumi thought as she breathed slowly, bushing the hair back from her damp face. It was still quite dark outside.

"I love them both?" She asked herself quietly in the darkness. It was some time before she fell asleep again.

_Kaoru entered the sickroom. She said nothing as she looked at the doctor between the beds, clinging to the life of the two men beside her. Finally, Megumi spoke as Sanosuke's candle flickered lower._

_"I love them both."_

_Kaoru nodded silently, standing in the door. Eons passed._

_The candles flickered lower._

_"I can't help them both." Megumi felt ready to collapse._

_Kaoru took Kenshin's other hand._

_Megumi clung a moment longer._

_"I love them both."_

_Kaoru nodded._

_Megumi let go of Kenshin's hand._


End file.
